he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
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Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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