So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
