i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
