plz talk dirty to me
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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