I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
