I'm drive I can fine osifer
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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