I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize