You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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