Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
She's the barista slut.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
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He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
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And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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