I queefed so loud it echoed.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize