ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize
