But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Panties = found
Randomize
