i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
