so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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