I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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