butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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