her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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