i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
