PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
