I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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