Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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