I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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