There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Threesome in a minivan. New low
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
