I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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