For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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