i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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