that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My pussy is not your playground.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
