Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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