I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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