I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i black out too much to be "responsible"
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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