I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
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