if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
