After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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