no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize