SEEEEXXX PLEASE
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
