one two three fourrrrnication!
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
