Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
