My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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