More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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