He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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