We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
