I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
