that's an acceptable place to lick
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
