if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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