i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize