if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
