so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
he thought i was a dude.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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