Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
