I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
