I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
