dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize